Monday, July 11, 2011

Public Dungeon Etiquette

A recent trip to a play dungeon has shown me that a few people seem to be oblivious to, or just simply disregard the rules of dungeon etiquette.

For future reference here they are, please read them carefully.


1) Keep Quiet!

Do not speak while observing a scene, if you want to have a conversation then by all means have one - outside the play area.  Find the lobby and go talk there.  I'm really not interested in the conversation you're having when I'm being flogged by my Sir, or training a sub.  It rips me out of head space and can really ruin a guy's night.  A night that he or someone else has so graciously paid for!  So do us a favor,  shut the fuck up.


2) Do Not Touch!

This has, shockingly, actually happened to me once.  When I say shocking, I mean "You've got to be kidding me, people really are this rude?" shocking.  When you see a scene going on, DO NOT JOIN IN UNLESS SPECIFICALLY AND CLEARLY INVITED BY THE DOMINANT OF THE SCENE!  Do you realize just how creepy and violating it is to have some complete stranger coming into your scene without warning?  For example, one night I was playing with a Sir of mine and he had me down on a leather table working my body over, when suddenly some random guy comes up out of the darkness, and starts playing with my balls.  I was so caught off guard and forced into a mental corner that consisted of a mixture of helpless subspace, and utter disgust.  Who the fuck are you?  I don't know you!  Get the hell away from me!  If that doesn't ruin someone's night, I don't know what would.
Don't you EVER intrude on a scene!  Ever!  That's disgustingly rude!

3) Keep Your Distance!

Observing a scene is fine, it's really hot seeing two guys getting into it.  Sometimes they even appreciate an audience, as long as they stay more than an arm's length away from the scene that is.  You can really disrupt someone's head space when you're hovering over them.  A sub may and very likely will even feel threatened by someone standing so close when they are completely helpless and in the deepness of subspace.  My advice is to stay by the doorway, if the scene is in a big room, then imagine the dom is using a whip, and stay out of striking distance.

4) No Means No!

As with all play you should always ask if the person you're interested in would like to play.  Make your intentions clear, and leave nothing to assumption.  "Hey I wanted to let you know I find you really sexy, and wanted to see if you'd be interested in me tying you to the bondage chair over there." If the person refuses, politely leave them alone.  Don't hound them or try to break them down.  "I'm not interested." means "I'm not interested."  Get used to rejection, not everyone wants to play with everyone.  I've asked someone if they wanted to play, and I received a flat out "No."  I smiled, said "Understood, sorry to bother you." and moved on.  No big deal, the dungeon was filled with other guys and scenes to enjoy.  What's one guy?

5) Clean Up After Yourself!

This really irritates me, you're in a dungeon, the room you like the most is empty and you can't wait to play.  You step inside and...what is that?  Someone left a used condom on the fuck bench!  There's a cum spurt still on the St. Andrew's Cross!  Who left their god damn beer on the bondage table!?  What the fuck is wrong with you!?  Get in here and clean up after yourself!  That's not my job!  That's not the DM's job!  That's your responsibility as an adult to clean AND sanitize the play space after you've used it!  Throw away your condoms, wipe up your cum, and for the safety and health of everyone, use the spermicide cleaner provided by the dungeon (if they don't, demand that they DO) and wipe down everything you used and everything you didn't use!  Who knows what kind of infections may be swimming in that cum puddle?!  You want Chlamydia?  I sure as hell don't!  Wipe it down, soldier!  NOW!



Now I'm a really easy-going guy, and I'm not usually this angry or adamant about things, however I find these rules to be very important and I hope I have made myself absolutely clear on how critical they are. I can understand being new to a dungeon and all, but all dungeons should always have their rules posted somewhere, usually near the front or inside where people can see them.  Newbies, please read the rules, twice.  It's also especially irritating when a regular and frequent visitor to a dungeon is breaking these rules because not only should they know better, they should also be setting a better example for the newcomers.




Play Safe, and Be Considerate.

My First Time in San Francisco

This past weekend was a very enjoyable and wonderful experience.

My very dear friend, the Canadian Soldier, took me up to San Francisco where I met Sir K. of the San Francisco K-9 Unit.  The flight up there was an experience in itself.  As I watched the world fall away from us as we lifted into the air, I was filled with a sense of awe and admiration.

Everything became so small, our cities, our structures, the grandest stadium of great size and pride became nothing but a trifling plaything.  The cars and people were like forgotten ideas and thoughts, in your mind for no longer than a moment before vanishing again from memory.  This view filled me with a sense of understanding of just how tiny we really are in this world, how all of our petty human squabbles are trivial and silly, from rudeness to politics, it's all so...small and insignificant.

When we landed Sir K. met us and showed us through the San Francisco airport.  We quickly boarded the rapid transit car and, already succumbing to the effects of the Benadryl I had taken, I was urged to rest.  I had been battling a cough since the weekend of my contest in San Diego, and a nap was sounding divine at that moment.  Sir K. took that opportunity to take pictures, later sending them to me saying "You look so adorable when you're asleep!"

Thank you, Sir.  I'm flattered, I had no idea I could still look attractive whilst under medicated influence.

Upon reaching our destination we were picked up by Master R. the head of the leather family, and driven to the house of Sir D.  After unloading our bags and sitting down for supper, I was asked by Sir K. if I had any problem with nudity in the house.  I answered that I had no objection to nudity in a household whatsoever; in fact I found the idea quite different and refreshing.  

"Good! There will be plenty of nudity in this house and I wanted to make sure you were comfortable with that."

  I was also introduced to spunky, Wolf, and a visiting friend of theirs who was referred to as "sextoy".  After dinner, I was lent a rubber one piece and Sir K. asked if I enjoyed gas masks at all, I replied that I was a huge fan and to my delight, was given a selection of three beautiful black masks to use for the events that would unfold that evening.  I chose either an English or a Turkish gas mask, I cannot remember the country of origin, but I enjoyed it nonetheless! 

The attraction of gas masks to me is the mystery of who is wearing this heavy, intimidating, black mask.  Their face is hidden behind a shield of dark, merciless rubber, like a soldier of sinister nightmares.  You can only look into their eyes, staring into you from behind shields of clear plastic.  Wearing one, I feel safe, secure, inside a little head bubble.  My breath echoes inside as I gaze out the plastic windows, my vision limited to two orbs, framed by darkness.

Sir K. took the liberty of lubricating me so I could slide into the rubber one piece.  Being a fan of sensuality he took his time rubbing the lube on my chest, my legs, and my back.  Sliding into the rubber, I felt it grip my body like a sexual glove, much like my neoprene experience, but rubber is much thinner and more delicate, requiring more care.  I pulled on my engineer boots and I felt something like a messenger from the underworld, I probably looked like one too, and I like that thought very much!

I was led down to the basement where I was shown into the dungeon, a small but well equipped space with a sling, a fuckbench, porn on the tv set, and the walls were plastered with sexy images of men in and out of leather.  My friend Sir C. was already playing with Wolfie and sextoy, and I was introduced to the group play.  I was somewhat tired from coughing so much during the day, and the medicine had left me weary, but I wanted to play.  It felt wonderful being between Sir K. and sextoy, holding sextoy against my rubber suit and slowly rubbing his light hairy chest, I wanted him badly the more I played with him.  Sir K. was very sensual, gentle, and touched the right places, his voice in my ear.

Sir K. then slowly led me over to the sling and asked if I had ever been in one before.  I hadn't yet, and was looking forward to being in one, this one looked very comfortable.  I was told to lay back and put my boots in the stirrups, when I did so, I felt very comfortable and could see why these were so popular.  I relaxed into it, Sir K. playing with me, my gaze drifting over to the three men intertwined in play on the floor, the grunts and growling of men in deep play rising into the air.  Sir K. had been edging me, bringing me close to final release, then denying me, plunging me into sexual frustration, the heat rising in my rubber suit and mask.  Soon the heat became too much, I asked Sir K. if he could remove the mask, as I had submerged in a mix of subspace, heat exhaustion, and weariness.  The mask came off and he said to lay back and relax.

I reached a catharsis at one point, I cannot remember if it was before or after the mask came off, but I remember Sir K. telling me to relax, to go inside my head.  That's when I saw something, a vision of some kind.  It was beautiful and so very peaceful and vivid.  

 I saw a burning burst of fire growing from a spark in the distance until it filled my entire field of vision.  I then saw myself stand up in front of it.  I was wearing my leather vest, my leather pants, and my engineer boots, there was a look of fierce determination on my face.  The fire faded into darkness, and then I saw myself standing upon a cliff overlooking a gorgeous stretch of beach.  The sand was clean and white leading into crystal clear, blue waters that calmly lapped upon the shore.  The sand led into the land which was covered by lush green grass, reaching into the island itself dotted by palm trees and a steep rise into a sheer mountain wall, which was carpeted by the same lush green.  This was My Paradise, my place of peace and balance.  Then my point of view turned, and I saw myself from the other side of the cliff, and behind me were throngs of men.  Some crouching, some standing, some suspended in the air, and I was at the lead.  I was leading them.  

Sir K. asked me what I saw, and I told him.  I told him I wanted to lead them into My Paradise, that "I want to lead them all into the light."

Afterward I was extremely tired, in a daze, Sir K. told me to go upstairs and write in my journal, then go to bed.


The next day was filled with much joy, as we spent the day at the Six Flags Discovery Kingdom in Vallejo.  I was introduced to the members of the San Francisco K-9 Unit, a group of pups, dogs, Alphas, and more.  These men were just full of fun pup energy!  Imagine a pack of men, ages 26-50+, walking around a theme park, some with collars and  bone pattern handkerchiefs in their back pockets,  occasionally barking, growling, and howling.  That's what my day was like, and it was the most fun I have ever had at a theme park.  Ever.  

Certain rides were too intense for me for several reasons, one I'm not a fan of rides where I think I'm going to die, and two I wasn't at 100% so I wanted to take it easy.  At these rides I offered to hold their bags and miscellaneous stuff.  Being the bag boy was part of my Titleholder duties of serving the community anyway, right?  In any case I was more than happy to help out, and it was great seeing their thrilled and happy faces as they came off the extreme rides.

On one ride we went on, Monsoon Falls, Sir K. said something to the ride operator and she announced over the loudspeaker "Let's give a shout out to the San Francisco K-9 Unit!" to which we responded with an uproar of howling and barking, most likely thoroughly freaking out the rest of the people in line!  When we were returning from the ride, the operator said "Please keep all paws and tails inside the ride until you come to a complete stop!"  She was awesome and such a great sport.

At one point in the middle of the day, I was walking with the pack and I had something close to an epiphany.  My heart brimmed over with joy and I began to tear up.  I said to Sir K.  "I just realized something wonderful, sir."  He looked at me and said "Oh?  What is it, boy?"  I smiled wider.  "I just realized that this is something that I've always wanted for a long time, but forgot that I wanted it because I didn't think it would ever happen."  He continued to listen.  "I'm walking around a theme park, having the time of my life, with a large group of my friends."  He then asked, "Are you happy, boy?"  I replied with a tear rolling down my cheek, "Yes, sir!  I am very happy and very grateful."

Later on in the day we were passing through a section of the park and "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" came on the sound system, the entire pack and I began to howl and bark along with the chorus, people stared, people laughed, I was having way too much fun to really give a damn about what anyone else thought, I was safe inside my new pack of friends.

When the day came to an end, we said our farewells and parted ways, some of us staying together to eat dinner that evening, and all of us very happy to have met each other and share a day filled with such wonderful thrills.

During my weekend up in San Francisco, Sir K. and the pack were all so very accommodating and concerned with my well being.  I admit, I was pushing myself very hard just being there with my cough and I did get a sunburn, and Sir. K and Wolfie as well as the other members of the K-9 Unit were very caring and sweet, offering me advice and taking excellent care of me.

My dear friends, I am so thankful and grateful for your love and care.  Thank you so much, I love you all.  I will see you again, hopefully at Dore Alley and Folsom!


Play Safe.